Indeed, diversity is nature. Allah swt. has created human from the tribe, ethnicity, skin color and gender are different. But in the eyes of the Creator, they are equal in rank, only the “righteous” that later became the only differentiating factor. Therefore, knowing the differences and mutual appreciation of diversity is very important in life. Included in understanding the differences in context and the way one’s mind when interpreting religious texts. Trying to empathize reciprocally on the other hand, may be able to bring that wisdom.
The theory of ‘reciprocity’ is very important in relation to read the texts of women and men in the books of Islamic Jurisprudence (Fiqh), including hadith texts do not give birth to a condescending view of one gender. When there is text that says women are the teaser (libel) for men, then at the same time we must read the ‘reciprocity’ that men could also just be a teaser (libel) for women. Therefore, they were asked to look after each other ‘capacity as a teaser’ is to not fall and plunged in sin and insult. (Read: QS. An Nur: 30-31). Women can be seduced by men, as well as vice versa. Similarly, when women were asked to be good women ( shalihah) against her husband, lovely, fun, keep yourself and meet the needs of her husband; of men also must we emphasize in our religious perspective to be devout to his wife, as we ask of women.
Without reading the ‘reciprocity’, our understanding of the hadith texts are often led to the view that women only as objects of satisfaction placed the man alone. Women will be humbled, for example, just because a few mistakes in terms of gratification of men, even considered worthy of angels and creatures cursed the whole earth, and dragged to hell. While on the contrary man is not the case for the commensurate case. Below, illustrated how when the hadith texts are interpreted in a number of issues without the reading of ‘reciprocity’ that gave birth to the view lame, and the reading of ‘reciprocity’ which offers a relationship between women and men are more fair.
Women, Men and Heaven
When Sheikh Nawawi Banten (d. 1898) derived a text tradition “Whereas most of the inhabitants of Paradise are the poor people, and most of the inhabitants of hell are women”, has been interpreted to mean that a person entering into heaven rather than the nature his poverty. Being poor does not mean better than being rich. Poor people go to heaven because it has a lot more time worshiping, easy to be grateful, no load treasure to be taken into account in advance with God Almighty. In contrast to the rich, where the time owned more to work, collect, calculate and maintain the property that belonged to them. A person when collecting treasure, he might have lied to others, cheat or oppress the rights of others. Poor people escape from the properties such as this, so they will be the most heavenly host.
But the dominanit religious view now, it does not matter in the first fragment of the Hadith texts. Poor people are no longer celebrated as the most heavenly host. The people actually are motivated to work, searching and collecting treasure as much as possible. All collection activity is considered worship treasure that will get the reward. Because with a treasure, a Muslim will be able to make the pillars of Islam, such as zakat, pilgrimage and fasting can calmly. In addition to establishing schools, mosques and public infrastructure needs. Wealth is power, and strong Muslim is better and more beloved to Allah swt. rather than a weak Muslim (al-mu’minu wa al-qawiyy Khairun ahabbu ilallahi min al-Mu’min, adh-dha’if).
Our religious discourse now, on various occasions often displays a text tradition that ‘it will bring someone pauperism in disbelief. ” Therefore, do not ever think or allow themselves to be indigent. In fact, widespread prayer Prophet. “O Allah, I seek refuge from poverty” to ensure and encourage Muslims to not be poor people. The first piece of text that the above hadith, that the inhabitants of heaven are mostly poor people, vanished from spread out. Even if still mentioned, will be interpreted ‘not pauperism’ which incorporates a person into heaven.
This is different from the second fragment of the same hadith texts, called Sheikh Nawawi in the book ‘al-Lujjain Uqud, regarding women as most of the inhabitants of hell. In the Musnad of Imam Ahmad, there is a history that most inhabitants of hell were rich men and women. Regarding the status of the rich has many interpretations as mentioned above, but done very little interpretation on the status of women. Religious view that is raised then, is threatening women with their status as residents of the most hell. Book Syarh ‘Uqud al-Lujjain own, do not interpret ‘the status of women’ but have interpreted this as ‘ pauper status’ above.
We believe, Sheikh Nawawi himself certainly believes a person does not go to hell just for having ‘sex woman’, as one does not go to heaven just because they have such poor properties. But more because of charitable deeds and the sins that made a woman. As mentioned in a hadith: “O women share your richness you all, because I saw the Fire had a lot of women just like you. The women asked: Why, O Messenger of Allah? Apostle replied: “Because you curse a lot (say ugly and painful) and broken (no thanks) to the granting husband”.
If our perspective is not ‘reciprocal’, in reading text hadith like this, we will attach to the women’s bad qualities, in relation to men, but not in men. Women, or the wife will always be considered unusual to say the words that hurt and did not know thanks to your husband. And at the same time not paying attention to men who behave badly on the wife, did not know thanks, sullen and rather angry. We also did not issue threats of hell to men like this as a threat to women. We rarely saw no religious demands on men for something that is done thanks to the wife in the house. While the wife was always warned not careless in giving thanks to each of the husband. Relationships are like this, would that be lame because only male subjects. Though women have done all things, satisfy and pay homage to the men, and offered gratitude of appreciation.
Ideal relations in Islam, between women and men is based on mu’asyarah bil ma’ruf. Where treat each other well to the spouse. In terms of respect and gratitude expression, is equally required of both parties in order to create a calm and happy relationship. Unsuspecting wife, as well as unsuspecting husband, in expressing gratitude for the services partner, will raise doubts among them, nourish doubts one another, and eventually gave birth to a sense of reluctance and resentment that could be created hell in the household before the real hell, in the Hereafter.
By way of reading ‘reciprocal’ in the discourse and gratitude hell-heaven, the husband demanded pay homage to his wife and expressed gratitude for the services of his wife, the same as our demands on the wife to respect and appreciate the service and giving husband. Text hadith about the ‘wife go to hell’ must be read with the perspective of ‘reciprocity’, which is based on general rules such as in the text of the hadith “Someone who does not thank people, then he does not thank Allah.” Husbands who are not grateful to his wife, means not grateful to God, and the behavior of a husband who is not thankful to God, can make them go to hell. Same case with the wife who is not thankful to their husbands, who could make her go to hell.
Instead they will both be residents of heaven, if they familiarize themselves with each other to give tribute to their partner, expressed their gratitude, to meet their needs, satisfying their demands are justified and their partners to seek happiness. Wife to husband, husband to wife and vice versa. Thus the principle taught by the Koran to behave one another with a ma’ruf (al-bil mu’asyarah ma’ruf, QS. An-Nisa: 19), in which the husband becomes a fun outfit wives, and wives so nice clothes husband (Surat al-Baqara: 187). Such households would be a paradise happiness for both partners, before the real paradise in the hereafter. What a beautiful texts quoted Sheikh Nawawi Hadith in the Book Syarh ‘Uqud al-Lujjain, that “If the husband looked at her with great affection, as well as if she looked at her husband’s case, then God will look at both of them with great affection as well. If they hold their hand, it will be dropping off the sins of their fingers together. ”
Women and Knowledge
One of the famous hadith texts on learning is “Demanding knowledge must for every Muslim” or “al-‘ilm Thalab faridhatun ‘ala kulli Muslims“. This text is in all the books of other traditions as well not only to Muslims, but many of the preachers and religious teachers who added it, to include Muslim women. Indeed this addition is not necessary, because of the way reading ‘reciprocity’: if knowledge is important for men, it is also important for women. Therefore, both charged with seeking knowledge. The rule language also, the text addressed to a man by itself is addressed to women (al-khithab dzukur khithabun li-li adh al-inats). Unless there are indications exception. In addition to adding in the text of the hadith is also not allowed.
In the consciousness of many Muslims, women are often restricted to acquiring knowledge as men. In the past history of Muslims, women once forbidden to the mosque for worship and learning. The learning process is done at women’s home, from the father or the husband alone. Sciences are taught in women, also not far from the surrounding menstruation, childbirth, istihadhah, childbirth and its obligations on the husband. Women was formed to not have a goal of becoming a cleric, the most far just trying to be a clergy wife. This is where the cycle began again defamation of women, for flirting scholar, or someone who is studying to be scholars.
Some weak and false hadith texts, never spread to support these tendencies. Like the text hadith: “Do not teach girls science writing, teaching them to weave just enough.” Although this text is considered to be odd (evil), al-Bayhaqi himself, but never in the history of past influential Muslims. In the early twentieth century, for example, Egyptian women more than 90 persent illiterate, unable to write and read. Islamic boarding schools in Indonesia at the beginning of its development also did not not provide classes for women, some even banned.
There is now rare, there is no prohibition for women to learn in the Islamic world, except in Afghanistan when the Taliban ruled. But the consciousness of many Muslims still finds connections between women, demons and ignorance-ignorance. Women personified as dumb creatures that always made the devil to ensnare a man from the right path. In the book ‘al-Lujjayn Uqud mentioned a hadith: “The woman used rope the devil to ensnare people. If only lust is not there, then women will never be able to subdue the man. ”
If a text like this, and other texts are worth, do not read in a way ‘reciprocity’ would suggest that has a lust that only men against women. Therefore, a rope used as trappers for the devil only woman to plunge men. Sa’id bin Musayyab, narrated saying: “That if the devil tempt desperate man, he will take advantage of women.” Prophet. also narrated in the presence of the companions said: “That woman will come to the image of the devil, and he will also go to the image of the devil”.
Though the texts of this tradition is weak, but most entered the consciousness of Muslims. Therefore there is a saying, ‘Treasure, the throne and ladies’ man who tease and plunges from the straight path and attempts to acquire knowledge. Women will also continue to be blamed as the source of all ignorance and destruction. There is a hadith text further says: “hell was actually created to fool people, namely women,” or “an-persons khuliqat Inna li wa hunna sufaha as-an-nisa ‘. Although At-Thabrani himself in this book states the text of this hadith is weak, but often we hear curses addressed to women, as the devil, hell and cause any damage.
Readings ‘reciprocity’ of texts like this, deliver on the core issue in relations between women and men. Of lust, which is inside of men and women’s lust is lust or libido, if not controlled could plunge the ugly deeds and sins, man and women. But if we are able to control it, and place them on things that are permissible, then Allah has provided rewards in sexual activity to that associated with libido, male or female. Women should not be a stigma from the slump of men, because men can be the cause of the deterioration of a woman.
Prophet. He said: “And no matter your gender activities including charity”. Then the companions asked: “How can we vent our lust, and is considered a charity?” The Prophet. replied: “Is not as impingement on the forbidden lust that will get the sin? Likewise when acted with lawful means will get the reward. ”
By way of reading the ‘reciprocal’, so the actual symbol of hell and ignorance, not being female. But the lust that nest in man, both male and female. In some authentic text hadith, women actually become a beloved symbol of worship Prophet. and sources of knowledge, as in Lady A’ishah. “I love three things: perfume, women and prayer which became an ornamental beauty of view”. In the book of al-Isti’ab, Ibn ‘Abd al-Barr narrated, that az-Zuhri said: “If science A’ishah. compared with the science of the wives of the Prophet. the other sciences are also all women, the science of ‘Aisha to be even superior. ” And Allaah knows best. 
- See full history in Sahih Bukhari, no. Hadith 3241
- Read: ‘Uqûd al-Lujjayn, p.. 14
- See, al-Jami ‘al-Kabir li-as-Suyuti, no. Hadith: 489, juz 1, pg. 1560
- History an-Nasa’i, no.Hadis: 5475, juz 8, p.. 654
- Musnad Ahmad, no. Hadith: 6770, juz 14, p.. 299
- See Sahih Bukhari, no. Hadith: 304, juz 2, pg. 30
- Narrated by Abu Dawud and at-Turmudzi, liha; Jami ‘al-usul, no. Hadith: 1033
- 79th Hadith in al-Lujjain Uqûd
- History Ibn Majah, chapter 39, no. Hadith: 229, juz 1, pg. 269
- Syu’ab li al-Iman al-Bayhaqi, no. Hadith: 2353, juz 5, p.. 464
- 89th Hadith, ‘Uqud al-Lujjayn, p.. 17, 10th line from bottom
- Syu’ab li al-Iman al-Bayhaqi, juz 11, p.. 433
- Ma’rifat ash-Sahaba, Abu Nu’aim al-Isfahani, no. Hadith 4048, juz 12, p.. 483
- Majma ‘az-Zawai’d, no. Hadith 5921, juz 4, p. 363
- Reported by Muslim, no. Hadith: 2006, juz 2, pg. 696
- al-Bayhaqi, al-Sunan al-Kubra, juz 7, p.. 78